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Black Sheep Tries Bleach is an all-original collection of honest humor dealing with daily life and relatable situations. This book is the modern day survival guide for all who have struggled with life’s growing pains—and lived to laugh…

Trick or Treat

It was Halloween night in the Chicago suburb of Arlington Heights. My great-uncle, a middle-aged man at the time, was home handing candy out to trick-or-treaters. The doorbell sounded, he opened the door, and there stood a beautiful little…

The True Story of Martha Mount and Mr. Murphey

Mrs. Martha Mount was a short and round, muumuu wearing, sixty-four year old Hebrew widow, with a scandalous reputation. Of the 1,801 citizens residing in the city of Lovelock, Nevada, Mrs. Mount was the most infamous. According to the Lovelock…

Miss Peller

With so much negativity and turmoil in the world right now, I thought I would share a “funny” to lighten things up.   Many of you know that I accepted my first book deal back in April, and with its release date scheduled before the…

#FML Moment 10

I had been having construction going on at my house and the final step was painting. The painter showed up, assistant in tow, and began applying my chosen color samples to the wall. I'm friendly, too friendly I've been told - which gets me in…

Mom's Behind the Wheel Multitasking

My mother is very good at multitasking.  As we drive from Wisconsin to Florida, with a Portuguese Water Dog, a cat on Prozac, and mini pig with an oral fixation, I grab the Oh Shit handle as she spontaneously veers into the right lane. I…

#FML Moment 33

How I imagine myself getting into my car when all eyes are on me… How I actually look, after I've rolled my hair up in the window! FML!!! ...humor happens Photo Credits:   &copy; Orrim | Dreamstime.com - <a href="https://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photo-high-heels-legs-image16154980#res10289678">High…

Hear Me Roar!

"You need to get practical.  Fairytales and falling in love isn’t realistic at your age.  You’re getting too old for all that, and it is time to get serious before it’s too late." "For Christ sakes, Daddy, she’s only 30!" my mother…

Pig Slang

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I would NEVER call someone a PIG - and here is why: Pig are friendly, loyal, and intelligent. They are naturally very clean, social, playful, protective animals that love sunbathing, listening to music, and getting massages. Pigs are skilled…

Chapter 1: Before the Fall

It all began on my September 2015 39th birthday - OMG, I discovered my first gray hair. By evening, my day hadn't gotten any better. I told my sister I'd go with her to some meeting at my niece's high school. What I didn't know; however, was…

The Kegel

Florence, my 72 year old widowed neighbor, is in incredible shape. Taking her regular evening walk past my house with her two Bichon Frise, Thelma and Louise, I commented that walking must be more beneficial than my gym membership because…