#FML Moment 10

I had been having construction going on at my house and the final step was painting. The painter showed up, assistant in tow, and began applying my chosen color samples to the wall. I’m friendly, too friendly I’ve been told – which gets me in trouble most of the time, and obviously the painter was […]

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Dick Doesn’t Live Here Anymore

  “Is Dick home?”  My neighbor’s eight year old grandson was back for one of his visits…and looking for my ex-boyfriend. “We discussed this last time, Noah.  Dick doesn’t live here anymore.” “Why?” Why had been Noah’s favorite word for the last three years.  I finally had to admit, Noah was a little “special”. I […]

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#FML Moment 33

How I imagine myself getting into my car when all eyes are on me… How I actually look, after I’ve rolled my hair up in the window! FML!!! …humor happens Photo Credits:   &copy; Orrim | Dreamstime.com – <a href=”https://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photo-high-heels-legs-image16154980#res10289678″>High Heels and legs</a>

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Hear Me Roar!

“You need to get practical.  Fairytales and falling in love isn’t realistic at your age.  You’re getting too old for all that, and it is time to get serious before it’s too late.” “For Christ sakes, Daddy, she’s only 30!” my mother said in defense of my grandfather’s heinous spiel.   My love life, or lack […]

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The Kegel

Florence, my 72 year old widowed neighbor, is in incredible shape. Taking her regular evening walk past my house with her two Bichon Frise, Thelma and Louise, I commented that walking must be more beneficial than my gym membership because she looked amazing! “No, my dear, it’s not the walking.  The only exercise I do is […]

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Water Buffalo Breasts

Several years ago, I had a breast reduction.  Now before my male readers yell, “Noooooo“, let me explain. Developing at a young age, I went from flat to a 34E in less than a year.  The older men started rubbernecking, construction workers started whistling and shouting inappropriate slurs, and my father just about had a […]

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